So here I am, flipping through the June issue of "UnZipped" (a naughty boy magazine that Ryan has laying around his house because he's a big horny fag). I started reading this issue because it proclaimed on the cover:

And I was like "Oh really? I thought all straight men were very anti-getting tied up. How interesting. My preceptions of reality have been challenged! Let's read more!". So as I flipped through the glossy pages of mostly naked men, I passed an ad that made me stop. It was for an online store: BuyGay.com who was selling something called: The E-Z Anal Douche. It was this big red bulbous thing with a little spout on one end. The description is as follows:

THE E-Z ANAL DOUCHE is easy to use! alone or with a partner, the endlessly refillable E-Z ANAL DOUCHE was designed with the anal enthusiast in mind!!

Now my question is, why don't they design OTHER things with the anal enthusiast in mind? Cars...staplers...baseball bats? Think about how fantastic life would be if everything that you use in your day to day life was ergonomically shaped to fit snuggly in your ass hole.

Oh what a world we live in.